How to Use Mistakes to Help You Succeed
Send to KindleI never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones. ~John Peel
Oh pleeeze tell me I didn’t really do that!
Sound familiar? How do you feel when you make a mistake? For some, a mistake is a mere bump in the road; for others, reactions may include disappointment, anger, alarm, agony, guilt, frustration, distraction, panic, tension, nervousness … or a combination of all of the above.
This sense of dread and self-recrimination combined with the inevitability of setbacks when attempting challenging things explains why many people unconsciously hold back giving their all to achieving a goal: they’re simply not prepared to deal with the mistakes and failures they’ll face on the road to achieving what they want.
What’s missing in many people’s understanding of what it takes to succeed is the fact that the more challenging (and meaningful!) the goal, the more frequent and difficult setbacks, and yes mistakes, there will be. Simply put, the greater you desire to create a better life for yourself, the more important it is to develop the ability to overcome and learn from your mistakes.
All mistakes are not created equal
Admittedly, there are good mistakes (they help us learn as we live) and bad mistakes (the careless or chronic ones that plague us as a result of thoughtless or irresponsible behavior).
But the undeniable truth of human life is that we will never stop making mistakes. However, your determination to learn from your mistakes goes a long way towards determining who you are and what you can become as a person.
How to use mistakes can help you succeed
- Learn from them. Instead of seeing a mistake as something horrible choose to view it more as a learning experience. Develop the ability to ask yourself questions such as: What’s positive about this situation? What can I learn? How can I prevent it from happening again?
- Gain experiences you could not get any other way. Understandably, you’d probably prefer to learn from other people’s mistakes and failures, but sometimes you just have to fail on your own to learn a lesson and to gain an experience no one can relate to you in mere words.
- Develop strength and confidence. You gain inner strength and confidence by accepting responsibility. You become more resilient by realizing more and more that a mistake is not the end of the world. Best of all, you find yourself easily handling situations that may have overwhelmed you in the past.
- Learn to give your all. Rather than holding back for fear of failure or ridicule, you are able to give your all to achieving your goals and dreams. So over time you become more and more likely to succeed.
- Improve your ability to let go and move on. It’s easy to make new mistakes simply by spending too much energy dwelling on and protecting yourself against the old ones. To learn to let go and move on after a mistake you’ll find it helps to develop a healthy sense of humor. Work to understand the mistake until you can make fun of it (or at least not want to kill others that make fun). It might take a few days, but eventually you’ll see some comedy in what happened and find it much easier to let it go and move on.
The most important lesson in all of mistake making is to trust that while mistakes are inevitable, if you can learn from the current one, you’ll also be able to learn from future ones. No matter when happens tomorrow you’ll be able to get value from it, and apply it to the day after that. Progress won’t be a straight line but if you keep learning you will have more successes than failures, and the mistakes you make along the way will help you get to where you want to go.
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Hi Marty,
thank you for sharing this insightful post!
Your suggestions are great and reinforce what my adult self knows.
Challenges active the little one in me and I have to do a lot of soothing selftalk, since through out my childhood I received criticism and severe punishments.
Posts like this one help remembering how mistakes can be helpful.
Love and Light
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Yorinda
Yorinda recently posted..How coconut oil may benefit your health
Everybody commits mistakes so we must not let it destroy ourselves, but rather let these mistakes mold us to be a better person. We must always remember that we can make use these mistakes in our lives as our stepping stone towards our goals. With the help of all our bad experiences, we can be more confident in making decisions and be stronger too.
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Maria Pavel recently posted..Pass the CNA Test
Hi Marty, great article, it really hits home about making mistakes. Boy, I’ve sure made plenty!
It’s funny though, when I wrote that I thought to myself, sometimes we think we’re making mistakes, and yet, someone else might not look at it as a mistake. Can’t think of an example right now, but it’s all in the perception of the person looking at it. (happens all the time in politics:-)
Hope you have a fantastic weekend! Regards from Julieanne
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Julieanne van Zyl recently posted..Are you ready for that quantum leap in your business?
Great post, Marty! You are so right about how mistakes can have great things in store. Ike Turner’s band Kings of Rhythm virtually invented guitar distortion when their amp fell off the top of his car on the way to Sun Studios. John Lennon discovered backwards music when he put the tape loop on backwards and liked the way it sounded. As Bob Ross reminded us so many times, there are no mistakes, just happy little accidents, and we just have to figure out how to fit them in our world.
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Steve Nicholas recently posted..Rex Ryan and the Big Picture
It sounds like you have made a few mistakes, Marty! I love how you explain that we have to start to view those mistakes with some humor. We often are the hardest on ourselves because we really take ourselves too seriously. If we can learn from our mistakes we can move to a new level in our lives. If we never do we stay stuck.
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Lynda Cromar recently posted..In MLM – How can you See The Danger, and The Opportunity — Being informed you Making Good Choices
Hi Marty,
Thanks for sharing this post on a topic that many people struggle with.
You have provided some excellent parameters of how to use mistakes in a way that can help you succeed.
I think the biggest mistake that one can make is to be afraid to make a mistake and then not try new things for fear of making that mistake or failing.
In order to grow, we must always be learning new things and new skills. When we are learning something new, there will be a learning curve and mistakes will be made.
But, if they are viewed as learning steps to gain new information and insights it will be a positive response.
By willing to put yourself out there and make an occasional mistake and hopefully learn from it, you are experiencing real growth and that is always a good thing.
The more you challenge yourself and make mistakes and then correct them and learn from them, the more confidence you will gain and then you WILL be able to laugh about it and go on.
Keep inspiring us,
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Marc
Marc Korn recently posted..Self Discipline: The Discipline Of Daily Time Management
Thank you Marquita for this post!
I have done many little mistakes with my site in choosing the right persons working for me and each mistake was a huge lesson. So, I guess I learned by doing, now it’s not a “drama” anymore, I smile and ask myself what is the worse think that could happen now?
When I reframe the situation I let go and learn to forgive myself instead of being a perfectionist critic!
Thank you for this post, there is always a lesson to learn to grow.
patricia recently posted..The Mantra For Sure Shot Success
Hello again Marty,
Your post is what growth is all about, this is how we learn and cause self developement. As you stated, “No matter what happens tomorrow you’ll be able to get value from it, and apply it to the day after that.” I always say it is fine to make mistakes as long as you do not continue to repeat the same ones over and over. I tell people that I find something to mess up everyday, because it is something new to me. This is how I force myself to learn how to do it right.
As they say mistakes are only failures if you choose to quit. Great post, a joy to read – TTYL
Marcus T Cox recently posted..Pain vs Pleasure
Marquita, I really enjoyed this post. Making mistakes is a part of life but how you deal with these mistakes can make a big difference in what you experience. Staying positive and learning from these mistakes will help you to succeed in life.
This is such a great post. I believe we can make our failure or mistakes stepping stones for future success. But it requires the points you shared. I think your first point is key, we need to learn from them. Looking forward to reading more from you.
Hi Marquita,
I remember when I lost all my blog for almost 2 days because of some rookie mistake I made playing around with stuff I shouldn’t have played with. I was ready to quit like so many times before. But you’re right.Every mistake I make now is kind of funny. Because I know it’s part of the process. Although I still feel bad sometimes when I do dumb things I should have already known. But yes, I’ll dig into anything now even though I have to go through all the action steps to make sure I can apply what I’ve learned. Really frustrating but the outcome allows me to take small steps and gives me confidence to learn another strategy that I already know will not be easy. It’s the only way to compete in this business and your post really helps people accomplish what they have a passion to do. Thanks : )
Rick Salas
Rick Salas recently posted..First Page Ranking and Why First Page Ranking is the Answer
Hey Rick, wow, do I know how you feel! I recently learned (the hard way) how to format an ebook to publish for eReaders at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, etc. I can’t believe how many hours I put into that (especially setting up all the internal linking for the table of contents!) and how many mistakes I made on that first book. It was a very humbling experience. Yesterday I formated my new eBook in half an hour! Could never have accomplished that had I not learned so much … and made so many mistakes the first time. Thanks so much for taking the time to share your thoughts Rick – always appreciated.
Hey Marty,
Love that quote, “I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones.” – John Peel
As you say Marty, it’s not a question as to IF you’re going to make mistakes, the question is WHEN are you going to make mistakes.
Accept this fact. Embrace it. Learn from your mistakes and realize in so doing so that your experience has in fact become an important element in your success.
Thanks for another great article Marty,
Kevin
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Kevin DeRoo recently posted..Video Marketing – You Oughta Be In Pictures!
Hi Marty,
Thanks for very interesting article.
“Gain experiences you could not get any other way.” – it is very true. I agree that the best way is to learn from our own experince and own mistakes. Sometimes I find it difficult. Your article helped me to understand that it is nescessary to “study” our mistakes. Thanks.
Hey Marty
I am an expert for a few topics simply because I was willing to learn from my mistakes.
I am a believer in trying things without worrying about making a mistake.
Good post, I enjoyed reading it.
Peter
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Peter Fuller MBA recently posted..How to Build Your Prospect List
Some of the biggest mistakes in my life have also had some of the greatest benefits in my life. That being said, I would prefer to mistake free in the future.
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Andy Nathan recently posted..LinkTube Is Pretty Cool
I hear you Andy, and I agree that while it’s important to focus our energies on the benefits, it’s never fun making mistakes. I know I’ve made some real doozies – the irony is, that looking back and knowing from this end how everything worked out, I can’t think of one where I would have done anything differently.
It’s alright if we will commit mistakes in our life because it is part of learning and all the lessons we learn from our mistakes will help us to succeed. Know that no person became successful without committing mistakes in their life. All the mistakes that they have done before taught them to be a better a person and they used these experiences as a backbone of their success.
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Candice Michelle recently posted..Importance of Inventory Management
I think it is so important to learn from a young age that making mistakes is a huge part of making it.. Learning or getting better or just plan growing. It is hard as a young person to accept making mistakes cause in so many cases the reaction that happens when a ‘mistake’ occurs, has such a negative response! I really believe that we need to learn to do as you have posted here and learn how to use the mistakes a learning. The reason I use young is that if we learned it younger we wouldn’t take it so hard when we get older, and the maybe be wouldn’t have such a hard time learning how to live with making ‘mistakes’!
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Holly recently posted..Do You Really Hate Exercise? I Bet You Don’t!
Hey Holly, thanks for your comment – and you’ve made an excellent point about the value of learning at a young age about how mistakes can help more than hinder us. What a difference that can make in a person’s life!
What a great post Marquita,
Fail fast, fail often, the faster success will come!
I appreciate all the lessons I have learned from my previous mistakes, and believe me there have been some really hard lessons. But I truly appreciate them because every problem contains the solution, so I just move forward with more wisdom and knowledge as I climb higher to reach my goals.
The most successful people have had many failures in their life. Understand that and you know you are in good company but you must continue to take risk at all cost in failing forward!
Eldridge DuFauchard recently posted..Remember the Thoughts You Had Right Before You Got on a Rollercoaster?
Welcome back Eldridge and thanks for taking the time to share. You know, I can really relate to your comment about some “really hard lessons” because I’ve had a few of those myself. Truth be known, i think most of us have them – we just don’t all admit it. I think that’s why I enjoy reading stories about how so many successful people started out. No matter how far they’ve gone in their lives, they started out just like everyone else, and made many of the same mistakes.
Great post! I think another mindset that will help us get past our mistakes is the fact that EVERYBODY makes them. Some more so than others, but there is no exception. It also helps having a positive attitude – the “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade” kind. Thanks for sharing.
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crescele recently posted..Are You In The Proverbial Dating Rut?
Great post on learning how to prepare for and handle mistakes Marty. I have gotten much better in this area lately. Learning to be mentally ready for mistakes and challenges has really helped me to charter unknown territories.
Justin recently posted..Mazzastick.com’s Guide 4 New Bloggers eBook
Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts Justin, so glad you enjoyed the article. I agree with you, there’s definitely a sense of calm and self-assurance that comes with learning to manage and make the most of mistakes.
Marquita,
This is an excellent post on what I like to call, Failing Forward.
Most people give up because of making mistakes and they perceive those mistakes as failure rather than temporary set-backs.
You give some great advice here on how to deal with mistakes and then move forward.
Thanks,
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James
James recently posted..Discover Your “Life Path” and Plan how Your Life Will Unfold