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Master Your Mindset to Increase Self Confidence

2013 March 19
by Marquita Herald

Today is a new day that has been handed to you for shaping. You have the tools, now get out there and create a masterpiece. ~Steve Maraboli

mindsetThere has never been a more exciting time to be alive! Opportunities and resources are virtually unlimited, and our ability to succeed is only limited by our willingness to embrace the challenges, and take action to make our dreams come true.

You may or may not agree with this statement, and some will probably wonder what planet I’ve been living on. The point is your gut reaction to it will be a clear indicator of your current mindset; in other words your overall view of life.

Mindset: A habitual or characteristic mental attitude that determines how you will interpret and respond to situations.

Your mindset matters enormously because it effects your decisions and where you place your focus, in other words, it has the ability to help or hinder you.

  • A fixed mindset can leave you feeling disempowered and a victim of whatever obstacles life happens to throw your way.
  • A growth mindset strengthens your self confidence because, while fully aware of the challenges, you believe in the power of possibilities.

Regardless of what your mindset is at this moment, the most important thing for you to know – and accept – is that your mindset is not carved in stone. Your mindset is what YOU choose to operate with. You have the power to be the person you want to be by choosing to think from that particular perspective. This is the essence of mindset … this is where you decide who you are going to be AND how you are going to do it.

Now the easiest thing for you and me at this point would be to finish this article with something like “6 Easy Steps to Master Your Mindset.” The problem is, even if you’re already convinced your mindset could use a little massaging at this point, simply reading a list of tips just isn’t going to be enough to get you to take action and create meaningful change. Real change starts from within with a hefty dose of self-awareness. And that is why there is power in asking – and answering – questions.

It’s not that we don’t know the right answers; it is just that we don’t ask the right questions. ~Tony Robbins

It may seem obvious to state that the kind of questions we ask trigger specific responses; but let’s consider a couple of examples to see how this can affect the quality of your life.

What if you were to repeatedly ask yourself questions such as “Why am I always so unlucky?” … “What if I had done this earlier?” or “Why am I always the loser in these situations?” Such questions are self-defeating, and the answers you get with them will naturally be disempowering.

On the other hand, questions like “What can I learn from this experience?”… “What can I do differently to move forward?” and “What am I most grateful for?” are empowering and provoke you to think in terms of possibilities, immediately setting you on the path to a more positive mindset.

Why not give this a try right now. Your honest responses to the following questions will provide you with a good feeling for your present mindset and level of self confidence.

Empowering questions to begin mastering your mindset

  • What gets you excited about life?
  • What can you do today that you were not capable of a year ago?
  • What one thing are you most grateful for?
  • What does it mean to allow another person to truly love you?
  • Who do you think stands between you and happiness?
  • How do you define your success?
  • Beyond the titles that others have given you, who are you?
  • What is your greatest strength?
  • What are your top five personal values?
  • What one thing have you not done that you really want to do?
  • If you haven’t achieved it yet what do you have to lose?
  • If not now, when?

It’s important to be patient with yourself because it takes time to master your mindset, and it is realistic to expect a few slips along the way. But the more conscious you become of your attitudes and mindset, the more natural your new way of thinking will become. This is the point where you’ll begin to truly believe in the power of possibilities.

Like more questions to work with? Visit the IGG Free Download page and grab a copy of 101 Empowering Questions.

thankyouI hope you’ll consider contributing to the conversation by leaving a comment and sharing this post with your friends! In fact I’d love to connect with YOU! To follow me on Facebook, Twitter, Google+, etc., just click here.

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26 Responses
  1. August 14, 2013

    Mastering your mindset into a positive aspect of you life will surely helps you a lot. Aside from boosting your confidence you can also improve the way you think, live and balance life into a normal pace. Thanks for ideal thought that you’ve shared.
    isabelkroemerau recently posted..Small Changes That Can Help You Lose WeightMy Profile

  2. April 3, 2013

    We are what we think. What we think becomes our reality. Action must follow thought and we really do need to focus and work at it to replace those negative messages with the positive ones.Posistive thinking can boost oue self confidence.
    Thank you so much for this great post

  3. April 2, 2013

    Tell yourself that you are exceptional. That boosts up confidence, and you’ll feel better knowing that you have a potential for success in your own way. Success starts with self-confidence you know.

  4. March 31, 2013

    You’ll have to help yourself in order to achieve self-confidence. Sometimes it’s all about telling yourself that everything will be okay. Most of the time, the body would just follow what your mind has in store for it. So start telling yourself that everything will be okay.
    Emilia recently posted..New Years Eve Cruise in Sydney 2012 Harbour Fireworks Cruise!My Profile

  5. March 27, 2013

    Mindset to self-confidence? Tell yourself that you’re a star, and you’re the best. Seriously. It’s not just for airheads and histrionic people because if you tell yourself that you’re special, and you’re about to make a remarkable difference in the world, eventually, your body will follow. Good luck!

  6. March 26, 2013

    It’s great post. It’s inspiration to me. I like this quote “It’s not that we don’t know the right answers; it is just that we don’t ask the right questions”
    People always tend to don’t know what to do everydays, but with asking the right questions, you would have a energy to do what to do and grow the self confidence as well.

  7. March 26, 2013

    You know what they say, your body takes on whatever your brain tells you. Ever heard about hysterical pregnancies? It’s when a woman thinks and believes that she is pregnant that her body is actually showing signs of pregnancy. That’s mindset. You can also do that in order to achieve optimum self-confidence.

  8. March 23, 2013


    I love to come on over to your blog! Mindset is something I’ve been recently working on for the past two years. Tweaking that little voice in my head that goes in the wrong direction, and putting it in the positive.
    I find that keeping a check on my mindset helps me move forward. Love your questions about mastering your mindset. Working “If not now, when” as of this writing! Doing what I need to do NOW!

  9. March 22, 2013

    Marty–Great post!!! It is so true that our minds control so much of what we do. We certainly all have challenges in life. Our reactions create the outcome though, not our challenges! Thanks.

  10. March 21, 2013

    Marty, I love the way you approach all these “lessons” you give with
    a different perspective from most people who write about personal growth.
    Asking questions works much better, makes us think and work things out!

    As you understand Marty, it’s not easy to change your mindset and you always find the best ways to help us change.
    Julieanne vanZyl recently posted..Have you been Ignoring LinkedIn?My Profile

    • March 25, 2013

      Ah, you are so kind Julieanne. My approach to personal growth comes from what I learned growing up in a highly dysfunctional family, and a decade of coaching and it really all boils down to acknowledging and taking responsibility for the power we each have to create our own best life. :-)
      Marquita Herald recently posted..How to Banish Feelings of OverwhelmMy Profile

  11. March 21, 2013

    I think I’m the one mostly standing in my way. I haven’t asked that question before, so thanks for putting it here on your blog.

    You’re right that we sometimes ask the wrong questions. After reading your blog I’ve made a conscious reminder to start asking better questions of myself. As you said, if you ask the wrong question you’ll get a defeating answer.
    Anne recently posted..Self-Confidence In YouMy Profile

  12. March 20, 2013

    Oh Marty You have done it again I love to read your posts they are always so inspiring! Mindset? Yes how we respond to certain situations! I love your list of empowering questions and I am going to go and get all 101 of them! Great Post Marty, Thanks for sharing! Chery :)
    Chery Schmidt recently posted..Stepping Up And Taking Responsibility For Your ActionsMy Profile

  13. Steve Borgman
    March 20, 2013

    Ouch, Marty! When you asked us what our gut reaction was to your quote, I have to admit I had a dose of cynicism as my automatic reaction. It’s time to increase my self awareness! I’m often the one holding myself back the most. It takes both a combination of asking better questions, feeding myself healthy mental nutrition, and taking actions of confidence to change my mindset.

    • March 25, 2013

      Hey Steve, well from what I’ve seen and read at your blog that must have been a temporary reaction. Seriously, none of this is about achieving perfection. I would be willing to bet even Gandhi had days where he felt pissy about the world :-)
      Marquita Herald recently posted..How to Banish Feelings of OverwhelmMy Profile

  14. March 20, 2013

    Hi Marty,
    everytime I come to your post I feel inspired and what you write about resonates with me very deeply.
    It is so good to have what I believe confirmed and also be nudged a bit further.
    For the last thirty years I have been ‘working’ on my mindset and it is ongoing.
    Your questions are great for self reflection

    I appreciate that you give away the 101 Empowering Questions.

    Thank you so much for sharing your insights and wisdom.
    Love and Light
    Yorinda recently posted..Imagine if we would choose to BelieveMy Profile

  15. March 20, 2013

    It’s simply like mastering the master. Our mind is our master and if we can conquer that, obviously we will be the king. :)
    Ansh recently posted..20+ Premium WordPress Directory Theme Collection 2013My Profile

  16. March 20, 2013

    Marty, It really is about hugging our life, embracing it fully! It is a mindset engaged to put our life into the right gear to do the right things. Such an essential thing yet many muddle through. Adopting the right mindset is the first step. Thanks for sounding the call to act! Jon
    Jon Mertz recently posted..Empathy: Making the ConnectionMy Profile

  17. March 19, 2013

    I agree with you Marquita, actually changing mindset is more or less the core of what I do both online and offline. Given that it took time to develop a specific mindset then it make sense that again time is needed to change it even if there are techniques like Hypnosis which can speed up the process.

    Asking questions is a great way to discover or re-discover our way of thinking and how we look at the world.

    Have a great day!
    Andrea H. recently posted..True Love: 11 Things to Consider when Looking for ItMy Profile

  18. March 19, 2013

    Marty, Remembering where you are going will make a world of difference in helping you in mastering your mindset.
    Jose Palomino recently posted..How to Get Plenty of Customers.My Profile

  19. March 19, 2013

    Thank you so much. Trodding on the same path as you and still learning and being honest about it just like you… especially thanks for your wonderful contributions on your site. A joy to read every time, a moment of rest and reflection… And they mean a lot to me and strenghten me in my own mission and personal development. A worldwide mission this age. Thank you for your wonderful, thoughtful, experienced insight! Feels like “sisters in crime”. New Age revived. Thank you!

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